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extraordinary world
May. 31st, 2006 02:41 amI'm alright. Sure, I love you, but that's not against the rules, and I enjoy it. I don't have to be "in" love with you, and I don't think I need you like that anymore. And god, doesn't being polyamorous mean love and trust and companionship and enjoyment of life without having to be constantly worried and guilty? I don't have to be in a romantic relationship with you to love you and contribute to your life and enjoy your company and have all that be okay.
And I really do love my life, because it was just an innocent conversation about something totally different with Kristi that made me understand this.
Plus a couple of songs.
( Put Your Records On )
( Give It Time )
It's like the music. I love music, god, it fills me up and lifts me up and changes my life. I'm flying in my head even if my feet can't keep themselves straight. Music doesn't hurt me. Music can't hurt me because I love music, because it's always with me and inside me. Music makes me cry sometimes, but music heals.
And sure, life sucks sometimes. I loved being with you and Kaitlyn. I'm not anymore. But screw weirdness. I keep saying life is only as complicated as you make it, it's time I start living it.
I don't need anything back. What matters is what I can give, because that is mine. My life is my life, my actions are my actions, my thoughts are my thoughts because they're mine. And I have a lot to give. And somehow, what I have to give will get where it's needed. Love doesn't have to hurt. There's my wings. That's my strength.
Thank you.
That may not have made a whole lot of sense in words, but it makes sense in feelings. It all came together about ten minutes ago. Seriously, all of it. I'm good. I still need a haircut, but I'm good. :P And now it's time for bed.
And I really do love my life, because it was just an innocent conversation about something totally different with Kristi that made me understand this.
Plus a couple of songs.
( Put Your Records On )
( Give It Time )
It's like the music. I love music, god, it fills me up and lifts me up and changes my life. I'm flying in my head even if my feet can't keep themselves straight. Music doesn't hurt me. Music can't hurt me because I love music, because it's always with me and inside me. Music makes me cry sometimes, but music heals.
And sure, life sucks sometimes. I loved being with you and Kaitlyn. I'm not anymore. But screw weirdness. I keep saying life is only as complicated as you make it, it's time I start living it.
I don't need anything back. What matters is what I can give, because that is mine. My life is my life, my actions are my actions, my thoughts are my thoughts because they're mine. And I have a lot to give. And somehow, what I have to give will get where it's needed. Love doesn't have to hurt. There's my wings. That's my strength.
Thank you.
That may not have made a whole lot of sense in words, but it makes sense in feelings. It all came together about ten minutes ago. Seriously, all of it. I'm good. I still need a haircut, but I'm good. :P And now it's time for bed.
